Welcome

Being unemployed gives you time to think. It is a rare opportunity to reflect on who you are, and who you plan to become. Financial difficulty is a life defining experience when faced with homelessness. I have a belief that everything happens for a reason. Having a chance to live outside of and observe a system we strive to be a part of, which will eventually destroy us gives life a new perspective. At times deep in thought I remind myself that the test of success is graded in your ability to face failure. As a young man aspiring to be a rapper I often wrote of my fear of failure, and my desire to succeed. It wasn't until age 30 on a windy October day that I embraced the idea; stagnation is like dying, all successes in life, love, and finance involve risk and accountability for your actions. The fear of failure is the same as the fear of success.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Self Titled

Mind of a Martyr What is the mind of a martyr? It is the thought process that brings you to the conclusion "you as an individual are less important than someone else, or a particular ideal." In my case humanity (for all my harshness) and beauty (for all my unsavory physical attributes) drive me to sacrifice self for others benefit.

I recently turned 35 only to be diagnosed as a sufferer of dystimia (long term depression) I work a job that daily causes me to question my personal integrity just through association with this company. I am a writer that just finished his first 10k word and lost 3/4 of it because of a busted pipe and caved in ceiling that ruined my laptop.

THAT however is only the beginning 2 days later the locks were illegally changed by my landlord so the could renovate which has rendered me homeless until I find a new place to life. While doing so and finding the perfect loft, guess who also learns he can't live there because of his previous criminal background ---> YUP this guy! Only I've never been arrested and that criminal activity shouldn't be a hindrance to me cause ... well ... I'm a fucking angel.

By now you should be wondering if any of this is true. I am writing this from my God Mom's sofa, instead of practicing for the National Poetry Slam which is 3 weeks away. I am a part of a great team and having the chance to grow with them over this summer is an even greater opportunity. We're still fund raising hard, and as much help as I need personally I have still and will continue to commit personal funds to help us reach Oakland CA to compete.

Before you can show empathy you have to understand. Understand I will represent my city along with my team, I will get that loft and rescue my belongings from bondage. I will rewrite and post the rest of "The Dictator" for you my readers. Most importantly I will not allow depression or Detroit to defeat me. When a world expects you to fail, rolling over and dying is easy. In Detroit nothing we do is "easy," especially dying.

So I will fight; I will fight myself, this depression, this city, these words, hell I will fight you. Everyone cheers for an underdog and Detroit has its share of cheer leaders I ... me ... we appreciate you. But underdogs aren't born until the fight begins.

World this is my fight, this is my resolve, this is my life, my poetry THESE ARE MY WORDS... and now is not the time to expect me to roll over and die. I see beauty here, love in this place through every struggle and every adversity. And I will fight with these words even if I am only fighting myself. People say pressure busts pipes or makes diamonds... I say it makes Detroiters and Detroit is making me! Feel free to leave a comment, every fire needs fuel.

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